68KB - Source: Male/Steve Martin
"Ohhh, you're right. And when you're right you're right. And you - you're always right."
96KB Source: Male/John Candy
"Your mother is so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck."
47KB - Source: Male/Chris Rock
"Of course that's just my opinion yada, yada, yada."
29KB - Source: Male/Dennis Miller
"Despite what you've been told men love to cuddle after sex. But why does your head have to block the TV?"
48KB - Source: Male/Dennis Miller
"And now ladies and gentlemen let's get ready to RUMMMMBLE!"
76KB - Source: Male/Wrestling Announcer
"Well then who's playing first?" "Yes." "I mean the fella's name on first base." "Who." "The fella playing first base for St. Louis." "Who." "The guy on first base." "Who is on first." "Well what are you asking me for?" "I'm not asking you I'm telling you who is on first." "I asking YOU who is on first!" "That's the man's name.""That's whose name?" "Yes." "Well then go ahead and tell me." "Who." "The guy on first." "Who." "The first baseman." "Who is on first." "Have you got a first baseman on first?" "Certainly." "Then who's playing first?" "Absolutely."
70KB - MP3 Source: Males/Abbott & Costello
"You've got the brain of a four year old boy and I bet he was glad to get rid of it."
22KB - Source: Male/Groucho/The Marx Bros.
"Get away from that tree before it dies."
20KB - Source: Male/The Marx Bros.
"Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?"
27KB Source: Male/Groucho/The Marx Bros.
"I'd horsewhip you if I had a horse."
18KB - Source: Male/Groucho/The Marx Bros.
"Hello, hello, hello, hello."
24KB - Source: Males/The Marx Bros.
"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas - how he got in my pajamas I don't know."
50KB - Source: Male/Groucho/The Marx Bros.
"I've never been so insulted in my life"
17KB Source: Female/The Marx Bros.
"Well, here's another nice mess you've gotten me into."
34KB - Source: Male/Oliver Hardy/Laurel & Hardy
Vincent Price's evil laughter.
112KB - Source: Male/Vincent Price
"You know this is gonna change everything."
38KB - Source: Male/Tom Cruise
"HELLOOOO! You good lookin' thing you."
50KB - Source: Male/Jerry Lee Lewis -(Thanks Virg!)
"That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind."
110KB - Source: Male/Neil Armstrong on moon.
"Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself."
105KB - Source: Male/President Franklin D. Roosevelt
"I'm gonna say this again. I did not have sexual relations with that woman."
71KB - Source: Male/President Clinton
"Zipppp, oh it feels good to get out of these pants"
66KB - Source: Male/Jay Sherman
"Now, I'm about to take off my shirt. A feeling of mild nausea is normal."
52KB - Source: Male/Jay Sherman
"Kiss my arse!"
21KB - Source: Male/Alan Partridge
Paul Harvey saying "Good-Day."
"This is what happens when demented people play with powerful toys."
50KB - Source: Male/Doug Tracht
"My MOMMA can do better than that."
22KB - Source: Male/Monster Truck Madness
A bronx cheer.
12KB - Source: The Bronx
"Hey, mush brain"
27KB - Source: ?
"By the way, congratulate me this Christmas, I'm going for it - no antidepressants."
47KB - Source: Male/Unknown
Sound of toilet flushing.
54KB - Source: Little Music Club
"Happy New Year!!!"
91KB Source: Group of Voices
"Happy Valentine's Day"
50KB - Source: Male Voice
"Happy Valentine's Day"
50KB - Source: Child Female Voice
"Will You Please Be My Valentine?"
60KB - Source: Child Female Voice
"Won't You Please Be My Valentine"
52KB - Source: Adult Male Voice
Big round of applause from the "Whose Line" audience.
134KB - Source: The Audience
"Ya fresh kid, I outta belt ya."
46KB - Source: Male/John Wayne
"Well, when you figure it out - email me."
21KB - Source: Male/?
"Can I get a hard copy of that?"
14KB - Source: Female/VIP
"Get off the computer and call me."
21KB - Source: Male/?
"That's my sissy over there. I see you. Hi sissypoo!"
43KB - Source:? Female
"Good morning, and yes you've won a fabulous eight hour day chained to this machine!"
58KB - Source: Male
Catcalls - whistles, heavy breathing, wolf sounds.
71KB - Source: Various sounds.
"Bye sweetie, I love you!"
18KB - Source: Female
"Will you shut up!?"
29KB - Source: Male
"You've got some mail"
63KB - Source: Sounds like a barbershop quartet. (Via Mooche)
"Master, I have mail for you."
23KB - Source: Female/I Dream Of Genie?
"This Halloween don't forget to check under the bed."
94KB - Source: Female
"I have come for you. I am death!"
70KB - Source: Male
"Welcome to my nightmare!!!"
42KB - Source: Male
"While that combination of heat and pollution is deadly to us here on the ground it should give us another beautiful sunset tonight."
71KB - Source: Male/Promotion
"Lots of grey skies in our future. Details at eleven"
45KB Source: Male/Local News & Weather
"Hey, we've got some fresh new snow in parts of the Northeast."
41KB Source: Male Voice/The Weather Channel
"Winter has definitely arrived here, on the continent."
30KB Source: Male Voice/The Weather Channel
"Here's a concept for you. Not every boy wants to marry you."
46KB - Source: Male/?