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ADVICE 
"Look at you. Why don't you do something with your life?! You sit around here all day. You contribute nothing to society."
101KB - Source: Male/Kramer(Michael Richards)/ Seinfeld
"Look I know that it's tough out there but you will find someone. You have so much going for you. You're kind, you're sensitive, you're honest...blah, blah, blah."
36KB MP3 - Source: Female/Debra Barone(Patricia Heaton)/Everybody Loves Raymond
"Let me tell you something about giving money. First of all you never just offer it to anybody. They gotta come to you with a really good reason and a whole plan to pay you back. And then, only after they've proved they're good for it, you tell 'em 'beat it loser'".
52KB (MP3) - Source: Male/Frank(Peter Boyle)/Everybody Loves Raymond
"The New England Journal of Medicine says, and I think my colleague here would concur, people with violent tempers are at serious risk for heart attacks and strokes."
106KB - Source: Female/Becker
"Alright remember, alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you."
51KB - Source: Male/Robbie Hart(Adam Sandler)/The Wedding Singer
"You've gotta harness in the good energy, block out the bad. Harness - energy - block - bad. Feel the flow, feel it. It's circular it's like a carousel, you pay the quarter you get on the horse. It goes up and down and around, circular, circle, with the music - the flow. All good things."
192KB - Source: Male/Potter(Kevin Nealon)/Happy Gilmore
"Shape up man. You're a slacker. You wanna be a slacker for the rest of your life?!"
58KB - Source: Male/School Principal/Back To The Future
"You know, self-esteem is a little like your car's brake fluid. You may not even know you're low on it until one day you go to shift gears and nothing happens."
109KB - Source: Male/Mr. O'Neill/Daria
"How do you expect anything in your life to change if you don't change?"
61KB - Source: Female/Will & Grace
"Video games develop eye-hand coordination and make kids into better human beings."
51KB - Source: Male/Dib's Father(Professor Membrane)/Invader Zim
"Get used to disappointment."
33KB - Source: Male/Westley(Cary Elwes)/The Princess Bride
"Now I want you to remember...that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country."
217KB - Source: Male/Gen. Patton(George C. Scott)/Patton
"Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life son."
16KB - Source: Male/Dean Wormer(John Vernon)Animal House
"Quit worrying, you'll be back on your knees in no time."
41KB - Source: Male/(Jack Nicholson)/As Good As It Gets(1997)
"You look for the negative, you find it and then you obsess about it. Move on!"
58KB - Source: Female/Margaret(Hattie Winston) Becker
"Hey, as your friend I can honestly say that unless you can provide for and protect your woman you should get outta the way and give me a shot."
74KB - Source: Male/Friend of Ray/Everybody Loves Raymond
"Well, it's a dog eat dog world, you might as well get use to it."
39KB - Source: Female/Daria's Mother/Daria
"I honestly think you ought to sit down calmy, take a stress pill and think things over."
70KB - Source: HAL 9000(Douglas Rain)/2001: A Space Odyssey
"It's gonna sound corny but I think when two people are meant to be together they know it."
59KB - Source: Male/Becker
"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in awhile you could miss it."
50KB - Source: Male/Ferris(Matthew Broderick)/Ferris Bueller's Day Off
"Go back to the golf course and work on your putz."
21KB - Source: Male/Lord Dark Helmet(Rick Moranis)Spaceballs
"Why jump when you can fly? Why leave when you can make an exit? Why slip when you can slide?"
60KB MP3 - Source: Male/Nissan Altima Commercial
"Denial can be an ugly thing."
24KB - Source: Male/Ace(Jim Carrey)/Ace Ventura - Nature Calls
"The jealousy you feel is merely the outward manifestation of your own deep seated insecurity."
76KB - Source: Male/The Bum/Becker
"You know this may come as a surprise to you but there is more to life then partying every night."
64KB - Source: Female/Margaret(Hattie Winston)/Becker
"I think it's time for you to start to seriously consider salads."
35KB - Source: Male/Tony Soprano(James Gandolfini)/The Sopranos
"Never give up. Never surrender."
41KB - Source: Male/Jason Nesmith(Tim Allen)/Galaxy Quest
"You know there used to be a movie goers code of conduct. You shut up in the movie you shut up about the movie and as a general rule just shut up."
89KB - Source: Male/Becker/Becker
"Every teenager needs someone to loathe and despise. It's what they do."
56Kb - Source: Female/Linda/Becker
"You wanna make an omelette you gotta break a couple of eggs."
30KB - Source: Male/Yes, Dear
"You know, I've be married for 35 years. And here's my advice to you...always be willing to compromise."
98KB - Source: Male/Street Bum/Just Shoot Me
"One must forgo the self to attain total spiritual creaminess and avoid the chewy chucks of degradation."
75Kb - Source: Male/Jim Carrey/Ace Ventura
"You know, when you open up to people you will always be surprised just how well things turn out."
81KB - Source: Female/Teacher/Malcom In The Middle
"You see, you do the right thing and everything works out for the best."
58KB - Source: Female/Lois(Jane Kaczmarek)/Malcom In The Middle
"There's no power in acting the way you think other people want you to be."
37KB Source: Female/Alley McBeal
"There are certain opportunities in life you do not squander. This is like discovering oil in your backyard or a rat head in your bucket of chicken."
27KB MP3 - Source: Male/Jimmy Hughes(Mike O'Malley)/Yes, Dear
"If things don't go your way just keep complaining until your dreams come true."
49KB Source: Male(Clinton)/The Simpsons
"A stranger is a friend you just haven't met yet."
27KB Source: Female/Janeway/Star Trek Voyager
"Studies show that when two people attracted to each other take off all their clothes and get into bed naked, things can just happen."
50KB - Source: Female/Alley/Alley McBeal
"Women, you can't live with them - pass the beer nuts."
41KB - Source: Male/Norm/Cheers
"Don't be a sucker your whole life, let me tell you something about men and women. We're liars and you're all idiots."
117KB - Source: Female/Kelly Bundy(Christina Applegate)Married With Children (Via Bill Pearl)
"Sometimes I think some work on your communications skills wouldn'd be a bad idea."
78KB Source: Female/Scully/The X-Files.
"Why don't you make like a tree... and get out of here?
43KB - Source: Male/Biff/Back To The Future.
"Yeah man, I'll tell you what you do man, you keep that dang old arm straight man, put your left hand still man - just speed the hell up."
75KB - Source: Male/Boomhauer(Mike Judge) on Golf/King of the Hill
"Never give up. Never surrender."
41KB - Source: Male/Jason Nesmith(Tim Allen)/Galaxy Quest
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Ensuing Category: Apologies
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