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Quote Of The Month
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.



This page is made up of some of the best emails to cross our computers. The Pocket Internet posts them as submitted and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to them.


Cover Item:

TOP TEN
via Mary Kay


Top 10 Things Men Know About Women:

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.




More Email:


LIFE SHOULD RUN BACKWARDS
via Ms. Taylor

"The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death. What's that? A bonus?

I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young. You get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating...You finish off as an orgasm."




Even More Email:

The Cross Examination
via Deb T.

A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer during a felony trial - it went like this:


Q. Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?

A. No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender running several blocks away.


Q. Officer, who provided this description?

A. The officer who responded to the scene. A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender.


Q. Do you trust your fellow officers?

A. Yes sir, with my life.


Q. With your life? Let me ask you this then officer -- do you have a locker room in the police station -- a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?

A. Yes sir, we do.


Q. And do you have a locker in that room?

A. Yes sir, I do.


Q. And do you have a lock on your locker?

A. Yes sir.


Q. Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with those same officers?

A. You see sir, we share the building with a court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.


With that, the courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called.


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