This page is made up of some of the best emails to cross our computers. The Pocket Internet posts them as submitted and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to them. Cover Item:  "New Definitions" - via Malmberg The Washington Post's Style Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter and supply a new definition. Here are some recent winners. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer. Glibido: All talk and no action. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an ass. Return to index of Pocket Humor pages... CLICK HERE TO REQUEST THE POCKET'S MONTHLY NEWSLETTER Check Out This Month's Newsletter Copyright © 1996-2001 thepocket.com All rights reserved.