 Cover Item:
"Email Notice"
via funny.net
ATTENTION!!!
ALIENS ARE COMING TO ABDUCT ALL THE GOOD LOOKING AND SEXY PEOPLE.
YOU WILL BE SAFE; I'M JUST EMAILING TO SAY GOODBYE.
The Middle Item:
"The Deer"
via netfunny.com
A man takes his wife hunting, and impresses on her again and again that "If you shoot a deer, don't let someone else claim that they shot it and then claim since they killed it... it's their deer!"
The man is in his stand for barely 10 minutes when he hears his wife shooting nearby. He rushes over to her stand to find her pointing her gun at a man who is loudly disclaiming... "It's your deer lady! It's your deer! Just lemme get my saddle off it!!!!"
The Last Item:
"The Accident"
via netfunny.com
Middle of the night, middle of nowhere, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the centre of the road. They collide and a fair amount of damage is done, although neither driver is hurt. It's impossible to assess blame for the accident on either however.
They both get out. One is a doctor, one is a lawyer. The lawyer calls the police on his car phone; they'll be there in 20 minutes.
It's cold and damp, and both men are shaken up. The lawyer offers the doctor a drink of brandy from his hip flask. The doctor accepts, drinks and hands it back to the lawyer, who puts it away.
"Aren't you going to have a drink?'' the doctor says.
"AFTER the police get here,'' replies the lawyer.
|
